Last night…..

counting on waking up rich today

Last night, we had a meeting for the benefit we are doing for Nick.

We sat at opposite ends of the table from each other. I watched him. He was smiling and laughing and getting paler by the minute. It was Chemo day yesterday. They load him up on steroids, Benadryl, and the chemotherapy poison. (Instead of leaving when he got done, he slept. And we let him sleep till 5pm. Atia was rather nervous about driving him home….something about US driving on the wrong side of the road.)


People were coming and going all evening. Things were getting written down for what we need to do, what is done, and who needs to be where when and such.

Nick was getting to visit with people he hadn’t seen in awhile. It was actually quite nice and he was enjoying himself.

Then Holly showed up.

And brought Fred (Sherrie) with her.




After I found that photo yesterday, I had been struggling all afternoon…..knowing I’d never get that man back again. Looking at how full his legs, arms and shoulders were. Remembering the trips we had taken, the fun we had, the love we made. He had the nicest legs and he’s down to nothing now. I hug him and I’m terrified I’ll break a bone. This morning as he’s sitting up in bed taking his Oxy’s, I looked at him. And it amazed me how emaciated he is.  It just breaks my heart.

The roller coaster of emotions every single day is exhausting.

So back to Holly and Fred.

And Atia even got in on this rousing good time. (she took this great photo)

i think my guardian angel drinks

Fred (middle) …… what can I say?


No one can have that much fun sober. But she can and does. And she got Holly and I going too. It’s just what I needed after yesterday’s struggle to not collapse, just overwhelmed from all of this, on the office floor. The more she talked, the more Holly, Atia and I laughed. I think I got more exercise laughing last night, that by doing my mile power walk! Fred and Atia were singing like they were at the Winter Dance Party. Holly and I just laughed and rolled our eyes.

Oh, and yes, 2 bottles of wine disappeared. The clear one only had one glass left. The other one? They tapped it. And drank it. Now I have to do something with the bottle. (my glass was 100% pure fresh squeezed orange juice. yes it was. stop laughing)

It just felt good to laugh. I have not laughed that hard in a LONG time.

Well since Kim, Holly and I discovered Fred.

So thank you ladies….you ARE the best medicine.


About Boo

Grandmother to 11....or is it 12 now? Getting back into life after losing the love of my life to cancer. Read my struggles with daily life........or don't. But I hope it helps ONE person get thru the same thing I went thru......
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3 Responses to Last night…..

  1. joliesattic says:

    So nice to have good friends! That is so wonderful. I’m glad they joined you. Enjoy!!!
    I just learned my dearest friend has lung cancer. I cried. I don’t know what stage yet or what treatments she will need. So if you don’t hear from me regular, you’ll know why. That’s what friends are for.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. fredrieka says:

    love that picture and glad Nick had a chance to smile. Bless both of you

    Liked by 2 people

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