Bittersweet farewell tour…..


So…I finally got an appointment Monday morning at the Passport office in Minneapolis. Keep your fingers crossed. If it doesn’t work, we’ll wind our way up to Door County instead.

We are staying in Roseville Sunday evening and it CLAIMS to be an 11 minutes drive to the office from our motel. I think we’ll give ourselves 45 minutes. It will be Monday morning in the twin cities, yanno.

We both just want to get away from everything and everyone. Mostly everyone and the phones. I’ll have mine with but it may be on mute most of the time. You can contact me via whatever….I’ll reply when I can. I most likely will wait till Nick is sleeping.

I’m thinking we might do photos of us in front of odd things and you all guess where we are….

Ya….make it a CHALLENGE to figure out where we are……*smiles*

Posted in Me

Time to start packing…..

Tequila for coffee

I talked with Nick on the phone several times yesterday. Each time his voice sounded stronger. This was so nice to hear. I really hope this break from Chemo will help him. I don’t know what else to hope and pray for anymore.

I pulled out the suitcase last night. I have to spend tonight getting things together to go. Cooler, clothes, shower stuff, money, pills, YARN!! I’ll get a lot of Crocheting done I think…….We have reservations at the resort in Canada he wants to go to. I think we’ll make it on Tuesday. I don’t want to spend 8 hours driving in the car and wear him out. 3 or 4 hours is good. There is NO where we have to be at ANY certain time. That will be the best thing about this journey. No set time to be anywhere.

I’m reading a book recommended by a dear friend of mine. It makes me laugh, think, cry, have difficulty breathing…The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. It’s also available on YouTube and I plan on watching it. It’s a very interesting book……I think it’s a book that anyone with someone they care about is battling cancer…..should read.

Your continued prayers, happy thoughts, best wishes and hamster sacrifices are appreciated. Hugs.

Posted in Me

The beginning of the end….?

Thursday when Nick and I went to his doctor appointment, they did a CT Scan. It’s shows varying amounts of shrinkage, staying the same and growth. So between Nick, Doc G, and me, we have decided to stop Chemo for Nick. He is too weak, tired, and thin to continue getting this poison that isn’t working for him.

Beyond devastated is putting it mildly.

She also gave us the hope that MAYBE, JUST MAYBE….laying off Chemo for a bit, letting him get his taste buds back, and resting……may help enough to let him start it again. I don’t know how much hope I’m holding out on that tho….I’ve been watching this too long now.

Saturday. We had Hospice come out, started all the paperwork, got it signed, and they will be coming on Wednesday for his first home visit. They will help him so much more than I can. I can hold him and sooth him. They can manage his pain.

Then next Friday, Nick and I are leaving for a 10 day trip. It will be our last vacation together. I’m hoping to get someone to take photos of us smiling.


For this trip, I invested in a new to me car. No, not one dime of the benefit money went to pay for it either. I had to *gag* thank my ex on FB for belonging to the Operating Engineers 139. *smiles* ok it wasn’t that bad…..Anyway, when the ex retired on Dec 1, 2015, my 55th birthday, I started getting my portion of his pension from the OE139 because we were married more than 10 years. It has been a good help with Nick having no income.

Sunday. Father’s Day. My kids came up with all the grandchildren. My folks were there so I took them for lunch at our favorite place. The kids showed up about 3pm and we got the sprinkler going. Nekkid and half nekkid children everywhere!! It was such fun!!  Nick enjoyed watching them.

Then about 4:30pm this crew showed up.

Kiwi Krew

Louie’s friend Ben, Louie, (Nick,) & Allan (Louie’s Dad) from New Zealand. I call them the Kiwi Krew. Allan and Nick met about 3 years ago and have been fast friends ever since. Allan and krew were here as Louie is buying a car this time to ship back to NZ. Allan has done this 3 or 4 times already. Nick really perked up when Allan showed up. Our friends Tom, Marty and Mary were with them. They had all been to Back to the 50’s at the Minnesota State Fairgrounds in Minneapolis.

Nick and Allan

Nick is looking a little more worse for wear. But Allan thought he looked way better than the picture in his mind. It was wonderful to see them and difficult to watch them drive off a few hours later. I find it very sad they won’t see each other again.

Allan’s wife Julie sent along some gifts. Here are two I snarfed up for my desk at work. Too cute for words and the bird…makes Kiwi noise. It makes me giggle. And that’s hard to do right now.

New Zealand Pets

Sunday was a good day. I’m glad Papa got to see all the kids and spend some good time with his friends Allan, Louie, Tom, Marty, Mary, my folks, my kids…..he smiled all day.

I’m looking forward to our trip….it’s gonna just be a leisurely thing….something catches our eye? We’ll stop. I hope he can stand all the riding. I’ll be doing all the driving.

Thank you all for all your love, prayers and support…….

Posted in Me

Time for a rant… chest hurts…..

parking spot

I just have no words for the assumption behind the author of this note. Get the FACTS first, asshat. You made a veteran cry.

no swimming.jpg

The attack happened at an area of the lagoon where “no swimming” signs were posted, Demings said. The boy wasn’t swimming in the water, but playing on the edge, about a foot or two into the water, Williamson said.

“No swimming” usually means STAY OUT OF THE WATER. And if you are by a lagoon where alligators have access? ……. *throws hands in the air* THINK PEOPLE!


Congressional Democrats are renewing their push for gun control measures in the wake of the Orlando terror massacre, arguing the best way to prevent suspected terrorists from carrying out acts of violence is to legally limit their access to firearms.

This guy had been under the FBI’s radar for a bit. TWO trips to Saudi Arabia. Co-workers had repeatedly expressed concerns. So instead of taking the blame for dropping the ball, let’s bring up THIS dead horse again…… It’s time to start taking things just a LITTLE more seriously. The FBI dropped the ball on this one, deal with it…instead of  “Well, let’s wait and see.” Ya.

I’m having a hard time with so many things. Nothing is getting done at my house. I really could use some help and no, I’m no longer going to ask. No one wants to come up and clean house with me. I have company from New Zealand coming on Sunday. I have a room I need to get ready. I do have one neighbor that wanted to help me garden……but that ended when her grandson was born 2 months premature. I’ll just keep going on my own. I’ve done it all my life….and I’m trying my best not to kill both cats.

Posted in Me