I just want to be home. There are days when I wonder if we are looking at weeks.
Then he rallies and I’m thinking months? a year yet?
Nick’s favorite place to be…..just touching me.
Head on my lap. Laying up against me. I can’t lay up against him as his abdomen is so tender and sore, holding my hand, his hand on my leg. Anything as long as we are touching. All he wants to do it cuddle.
And apologize….for us not being able to do anything. Anything but cuddle on the couch. We go to church twice in 6 weeks if we are lucky. We try to do normal things on weekends like go out to eat, shop, visit somewhere within an hours drive…… Right now we are going to Grad Parties. We have 2 on Saturday. We’ll go to the first one, he’ll eat something, get sick, we’ll go home and he will sleep for 4 hours while I wander around lost. I don’t know if we’ll make the second one. We didn’t last weekend. I had to go to the second one alone. Which, in this case, was OK. But I detest doing things alone.
And now it’s 1pm. I’m still here. And today I’m glad I am. I ran across a link in the news today to the powerful letter that was read out loud, in court, for all the world to hear, to that the worthless felon Brock Allen Turner by the strong young woman he assaulted and raped and yes, LIED about. What a WONDERFUL letter for all the wrong reasons. She should NOT have had to write it. Period. All young women should read it…..and learn from it, that there are boys out there (not men, even at that age, when they do irresponsible things like this) that JUST don’t get it.
I just want to hug her and tell her she will get thru it. That the pain will dull with time. You learn to COPE, you just never forget. That it will always seem ‘like it happened yesterday’ even when it was years ago…………
My current crochet project. I’m just lovin’ this stitch!! I used a larger crochet hook and believe it or not, it’s softer, snugglyier? and more fluid……I just really love it. It’s going to make someone’s neck VERY warm next winter……Almost done and I’ll be onto the next one!!
I need to get some dialogue going about what to do when things get ‘complicated’ toward the end. I’m hoping that won’t be for a very long time yet, and then there are days I wonder if he’ll make it thru the night…living in the unknown…………