Last night was rougher…

Keep fighting

Found this on FB last night.

It’s so hard to keep fighting. If I had an HOUR to myself so I could scream, it would help.

I got home last night to find him laying on the couch, almost unable to move. I think LF being there is wearing him out. It’s just more stress. A little consideration would be nice.

(A tiny example “What time is it?” EVERYONE else would say “About 2ish” He would pull out his phone, 2:01PM he will announce (and sometimes he even adds seconds) after someone else already has said. And he is that nit picky about everything.  How far is it? About 20 miles. 19.8 miles! Whatever. It makes any kind of conversation a JOB. And Nick doesn’t need that kind of stress. NO ONE ever needs to talk about every minute detail like he does…..)

But apparently the stress diet is working. I’ve lost 3.5 pounds in the last couple weeks. I hope it keeps going so the seamstress has to take IN my Mother of the Bride’s dress for my daughter’s wedding. Megann and I were just talking about that yesterday. Nick really wants to be here to help walk her down the aisle.

“I’m hoping for that, too.” she stated.

It’s not looking good. If he IS still here, it will be in a wheelchair, I’m afraid.

At 4pm I woke up to hit the loo, let the dog out because strangely he followed me to the door. Very seldom does he do this. Well, we had company. A white dog with a darker head and tail and 3 large spots on his left side…was sniffing all over my front yard around my cars. Jegs was growling so this wasn’t a good thing. He usually gets along with everyone.


At 5am, Nick woke me. He was FREEZING cold. I tried to get him to take his meds. “I thought you already gave them to me.” Very confused. At 7am he was drenched in sweat. He’s getting the fevers. Yay. Just changed sheets on Monday night, now tonight I’ll change them again. Also tonight, we have to get more paperwork straightened out.

I just want to be home.


About Boo

Grandmother to 11....or is it 12 now? Getting back into life after losing the love of my life to cancer. Read my struggles with daily life........or don't. But I hope it helps ONE person get thru the same thing I went thru......
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4 Responses to Last night was rougher…

  1. fredrieka says:

    Each step you take, keep your faith, hold on to what time you have with him

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Can you take family leave at this point?
    I know you said you weren’t able to take time off work, and I don’t know enough about family medical leave to really give advice.


  3. tee says:

    So sorry Sue,My prayers are with you

    Liked by 1 person

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