I thought I would….

please-dont-judge

….repost this picture ….

I don’t think my “daily struggle ” is as intense as it was in the first weeks and months.

Learning to accept that Nick is not coming back (pause as that truck hits me once AGAIN) will be a daily thing for the rest of my life.  He and I had something special.  Something I don’t think I will find again.

Which, if you stop to think about it, makes sense. Any man I meet and decide to spend time with isn’t going to be like Nick. He will be his own person; I cannot compare him to Nick.  That would not be fair.

I have this wall that just literally flies up around my heart when I think about the future and the possibility of loving again.  Am I afraid of forgetting Nick? Of enjoying life without him? I told him before he died that I couldn’t see myself loving anyone else.

And yet……as time passes and my heart heals, I find myself thinking more and more about not being alone for the rest of my life.

If I find someone, it will be a whole different kind of love. I have had the love of my life already.

So what kind of love will a new man inspire in me. . . . . ?

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4 Responses to I thought I would….

  1. Val Ewing says:

    Don’t worry about it so much. Sit back and let things be. That is the best thing to do. I … think.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ronda says:

    ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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