~~“You know that place between asleep and awake, that place you will remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you, Peter Pan….. That’s where I’ll be waiting” ~~J.M. Barrie
My friend YR sent this on yesterday’s post. It’s so appropriate my eyes just started to leak thru my smiles. I will always miss him, I will always love him, I’ll be waiting to be with him again one day. I would love for him to come to me in a dream, but then I have him with me on my videos and voice mails. I know I’ll never see him again. Because a dream…..is just that. A dream.
~~’Fairies have to be one thing or the other, because being so small they unfortunately have room for one feeling only at a time. ~~Peter Pan, “Peter Pan” by J.M. Barrie
There are many times I wish I was a fairy……as the emotions can be overwhelming. I was sitting at my desk last night, getting taxes ready to go to the lawyer. I kept running across the receipts for medicine, the appointment lists, and his blood #’s that would decide Chemo or no. And of course, it just hits me anew. I stopped. Put down my pencil. And just sat there. Feeling INCREDIBLY ALONE.
I’m sitting at my desk. Alone. I look up and I don’t see him. I can’t get up and go sit with him and talk on the couch, or go into the bedroom and snuggle up with him. I can’t call him just to say “hey, I miss you, when will you be home?”
I am alone. And it’s such a foreign feeling. So odd to be sitting there KNOWING I can’t go find him.
So instead I look at his photo.
And know that I loved him enough to let him go.
To let him be at peace.
And now? I have to find mine.