Find your happy….

I can’t wait to stomp in puddles! Especially when I have a friend walking next to me.

wearing shorts

and socks with their sandals.

Hey they deserve it!

I already drive with the windows down, SINGING at the top of my lungs. If you don’t like it? don’t listen or better yet JOIN IN!

I talk to strangers every day. Some stranger than others. But hey, life IS an adventure.

I hug someone every day, my daughter, my friend, my friend up the road….I don’t care as long as they hug me back.

I’m Sagittarius. Of course I’m gonna go barefoot. Plantar Faciitis be damned!

Don’t have time for naps.

Make lots of love……they just HAD to stick that one in there didn’t they??? Dammit.

Try new things. . . . . hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Spend time with my kids. My grandkids. Any kids I can find.

I laugh more now since California. I do love vacationing there.

Life is too short. Dance Nekkid.

I feel more like my old self every day. I don’t need to be checked on every day. If I’m having a down day, I can handle it now. I loved Nick more than life. And he is now in a place in my heart where I can look at him and not lose it. (Ok, not lose it very often anymore)

I am moving on and it actually feels good.

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I’ve been thinking….

My daughter goes home in less than 2 months. June 15th. I’m going to be a mess when she walks thru that gate. In fact I am tearing up just writing this. Daughter has been a JOY since she got here…..Even with her inability to understand recycling. *sigh*

This photo is titled going home.  I ran across it as I was looking for the friendship one below and it changed what I was going to write today.

Earn is going home. And like Matteo, it’s gonna kill me to let her go. I’ll be alone in my house again. But I think I will be OK this time. I am stronger than I was in August when I spent 5 weeks alone in my house after Nick died.

I think I am actually looking forward to being alone. That in itself is amazing. Because even thought Earn is leaving, I will MISS her beyond words, yet I want to be by myself. Man I sound like I’m babbling but then you all can figure it out. Consider it your challenge for today.

Friendship is weird. I have a best friend that I do things with here. I have several best friends up in the cities that I do things with when I can. And I have a best friend who died and I miss beyond words.

.

It’s just one of those days today. Thinking, like my photo at the beginning says…

….rarely a good thing.

Yesterday was Sad Day…

Today is a Happy/Sad day.

Happy that my friend finally sold his house and can now do what he wants to do instead of being tied to his past and remnants of a bad marriage. He’s moving on. I’m very happy for him. But sad as he’s moving to Texas. I won’t see him very often anymore. He and I have been friends for over 12 years. I will miss him a lot. If this all works out with AW, however, I’ll get to see him whenever we go to Texas. AW’s best friend lives there. So I’ll have 3 friends there and maybe Rusty in Austin will mosey on down with my Rottie pups…? Eh Rusty? One can have hope.

This was me yesterday. And yes, if I drank all three of those (look above) I’d be doing the next thing. (Look below) I’m thinking Friday night is the perfect night for me to light a fire and toast myself. And I do mean toast by raising a glass….over, and over, and over again.

It is time for a stress release night and IF it’s not raining, I’ll be doing a bonfire after I get home from Gabe’s wake. If it’s raining? I’m going to put the fireplace on Netflix and drink in front of it. Alone. I just need to be alone right now I think. Cause I need to think.

My pup is gonna ter die. Last night, Addy came home and said, “Um Mom? (Yes, I have yet ANOTHER daughter) the front step is covered in dirt.” I’m like WTH? So I go look. Bodhi has dug in a huge flower pot. Lucky for him there was nothing planted in it yet. My front step is a MESS.

However, this morning I discovered my clematis plant all torn up all over the front step too. If putting it in water re-roots it, he may live. Regardless, he is now banished to the outdoor kennel. I’m done. Granted, he is only 6 months old but I’m done. He will not be allowed to be out where he can do this shit. He’s dug one HUGE hole, and a bunch of smaller ones. If that huge hole ruins my cement school sign? It won’t be pretty. I do NOT find it funny. After yesterday, I am beyond angry with him. No more sleeping on my bed or being in my house. I cannot take the stress of him right now. I thought he was doing SO well, then he pulls this major FU. His discipline is banishment for now till I calm down.

Y’all have a better day.

I have nothing today…

……….except this.  I had this at one time. He chose not to continue our relationship.

That still makes me sad.

For some reason it seems to be a sad kind of day. I really need to get outside.

I CALL BS…pardon my language

From an article on the death of child star Erin Moran:

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2017/04/24/erin-moran-likely-died-complications-stage-4-cancer-autopsy-reveals.html

Her distance from her California support system of former child stars may have contributed to her struggles, according to Paul Petersen, of the child-actor advocacy group A Minor Consideration.

“She was so far away in Indiana,” Petersen lamented in a Facebook post early Sunday morning. “The help she ran from was right here, as close as a call.”

Petersen, himself a former child star on “The Donna Reed Show,” said the group did its best for Moran.

“I am proud of our efforts over the years to help Erin Moran whose troubles were many and complex. Don’t doubt for a moment that we tried…sincerely tried through time and treasure…to give comfort to one of our own.

“At least a half-dozen [former child stars] were actively reaching out to Erin in the last week of her life… From Paris to London, from New York to LA, our members were in there pitching, doing what they could to help. Do not doubt that for a minute.”

NO WHERE DOES IT SAY ANY OF THEM ACTUALLY GOT OFF THEIR GOLDEN THRONES AND WENT TO HER. The help she RAN from?? Was a phone call away?? They should have GONE to her. So far away in Indiana. BS. Same distance for THEM to travel and apparently they aren’t sick. Ms. Moran WAS. You always go to them when someone is ill. Sheesh. Hollyweird strikes again.

Done ranting for today.

Alfred Hitchcock is alive, well, and filming in my yard!

(key horror movie music)

As I stepped to the window, they all took off. My yard was black from these birds. It was freaky. They all flew up and landed in my trees….looking down on my lawn.  Or me. I’m not sure. I’m only sure I don’t want to know what was going thru their tiny little sharp beaked minds!!

My lawn looks so good! I think I may get me one of those mowers. A friend came down and mowed with his bagger mower for me for the first time. Corn shucks everywhere so this looks … wow. I can’t get over how nice it looks! Like a green carpet. Just wow.

It was 72* on Sunday. It was so beautiful outside. I sat around my fire pit for several hours. Just sitting, thinking, talking with him (AW) on messenger. It was a very relaxing Sunday afternoon.

This pile is the last of the mess from Winter and the storm that went through. These twigs/branches came from the front corner of the lawn where the birds are.  (Notice the TWO wheelbarrows full under the pine in the back right?) Ya, I pulled dang near one full from just out of the trees. The rest covered the ground. It was crazy this year.  When he (AW) gets here, we’ll have another bonfire and get rid of all of this.

My stunning daughter, Earn and I. This photo turned out SO good! She went to Prom with a girlfriend and her date. She looked so nice. And she says she had a good time. I’m so glad. Prom can be pretty important. There were SO many kids at the park getting photos. It was NUTS. I picked her up Sunday morning. I’m glad she had fun…..

It’s Monday….and I was having such a good Wednesday till I realized that.

Crap.

My kitchen….

This is what the ugly thing started out like.

After my son put my stove where it belonged, a new counter top and added a breakfast bar.

Then I got sick of the wood because I could NOT scrub it clean anymore, I started painting.

And changed my mind mid paint job. LOVE this!

Then my son did the new flooring.

Now go back and look at that first photo…..