It has taken a while. I didn’t expect to learn to cope with his death this fast, and yet it seems so LONG!….. But Monday night was the first time in a while I’ve lost it over him. Lately, I think of him, get sad, leak a tear or two, and feel somewhat melancholy for a while. But this is not dropping me to my knees nearly as often as it used to. It has been a while now.
Monday was the evening my daughter and I started sorting through the many boxes of ‘STUFF’ Nick accumulated over the years. Man he had a LOT of STUFF. Books, magazines, catalogs, toy cars,trucks and vans of all sizes, posters, ashtrays, bags, radios, cards,….you name it!
It is actually feeling pretty good to get this done. Just looking at that room was depressing. And helped me feel the loss just looking at all that stuff. As we get it sorted, it is turning into the boy’s room. Slowly but surely.
My living room is a disaster. My downstairs bath is hopefully getting done this weekend………. FINGERS CROSSED!! My son is coming up tonight to look at doing the kitchen and dry bar.
Soon this house will be ‘mine’ without Nick’s fingerprint all over it.
I think that’s what I need to finish healing and learn to fully cope with him.
I will miss him forever. It just won’t hurt so much.