Friday Five revisited

1) I just realized I haven’t done a Friday Five for a while! Does that count as a thought? Ow. Ok, yes it does.

2) Just looked at photos of S on Instagram. Gary’s g’daughter is adorable. I can’t wait to see her again next month! She has changed so much. 3 months old already…..I would love to get her and Willa together. LOL

3) Gary’s class reunion is tonight. I’m a bit nervous. 3 of his co-workers and one of my friends have us married already. It’s been 8 months. And I don’t think I want to marry again. So stop with the pressure ok people?

4) It’s a crisp fall day today. And raining. Sheesh. And too chilly for the shirt I’m wearing EEEEEEEEEEK!!!

5) Took both a/c units out last night. I like how things are getting done at my house. When I get home on Sunday, toys are being moved out of my living room and up into the boys room. I’m done. They move my shit, I’m moving theirs. I want my living room to be a living room again.

That’s all the energy I have today. I’m tired, angry, scared, upset, pick a word I don’t care which one. I’ll get through this like I always do.

Later taters.

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I’m getting VERY frustrated….

….and thanks to my English friends (and my English heritage) I hear that as frusTRAted now instead of FRUStrated.

Frustration Cat - I Haz It

Gary overdid it so no supper in town tonight and I was really looking forward to sushi.

SINGLE TEAR

Daughter and hubby have been signing papers for a house. While NORMALLY this would be a good thing, it’s been kept a secret from me because God knows I’ve never bought a house before and know what to look for. Apparently her brothers have looked at it and it’s not NEARLY worth the asking price. I think they should keep looking but papers are being signed at a rapid rate. I won’t be able to  bail them out……….again.

I just looked for homes for sale in the same town her brother is in and where she grew up. I found one for less than HALF what the other one is. Yes, It needs work and paint but it’s $57K instead of $150K.

frustrated its fine

I had planned on going to Colorado to see Ronda. But with this house stuff now, I don’t know WHEN things are gonna happen and I need to be at home to help pack up so MY stuff doesn’t get mixed in. This could get interesting. I had TICKETS FOR $77 RT too!!!!! Mid November. But with as slow as house things happen, THAT will be when they are going to move! DAMMIT. I’m just getting so upset between Gary, Nicole and my kids…

Drink. Ya. That’s what I’ll do instead.

frustrated cat

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I love my daughter in law…..

Needed someone to chat with last night and I picked her. Poor girl.  I was wobbling pretty hard last night. And I was sober! She talked me to non wobble……..

Nick was pretty unique. And he was my other half. Most of the time I cope pretty well not having him here with me still.

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Then there are days it slams back into me. Gary’s surgery did this to me. I felt like I was back in Oct 2014. That’s all I could see. I was in a different hospital with different family around me, a different man in the hospital bed and yet all I could see was Nick.

I didn’t want to be there. And I told him that. He knew why I said it and it’s OK. He understood. But I have not yet come back from it. I stayed. I was there the whole time except when his daughter and I went to get lunch. I was there. I stayed.

It’s been a week now.

I’m better than that. I’m faster than that. But not this time I guess.

I’m going to go visit R in CO for a long weekend. If I could only get dates worked out. Just when I think I have it figured out, I discover a wedding, or a craft fair, or or or…….. just dammit.

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This is what I woke to this morning…..we had some NASTY winds last night. Tornado watches all around us.

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The only good thing about this is there is an evenings worth of heat there. Next spring.

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He gets cuter every day. I love this kid to bits and back.

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Did I write yesterday….

I can’t remember. (just went back and looked. It’s been 4 days)

And how do I change my font in here? Write it elsewhere?? *sigh*

I’ve been in a funk ever since Gary’s surgery. It has made memories slam back into me and I cannot shake them. I have been short with him, with the Filter Queen guy last night but only after he asked me to drive him to Chicago. (He was bigger around than he was tall.), with the g’sons. I need to get away. I think I’ll go to Ronda’s by myself for a long weekend. Now if I can only find plane tickets reasonable. (OK, $124.80 RT. That’s reasonable)

Gary’s class reunion is Friday night. I am not looking forward to it, yet I am. LOVE the up and down mood swing shit. Very similar to the up and down weight thing. Dammit.

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On some more fun news, my parents just got Grandchild #17 this morning. Abigail Scotlyn was born early this morning. Can’t wait to meet her.

Willa is growing like crazy . Soon she’ll be walking. Pulling herself up on Nonna to stand then she smiles at me. Stinker.

Lennox is a kindergartner. The mouth has begun. Yay. Think his mommy and daddy are looking at loans for homes now. Finally. Fingers crossed. I just want my house back.

Jegs stayed asleep for an hour after I got home last night. I had to wake him to say hello. He was so excited to see me. My old boy is fading. This makes me incredibly sad. I think I’ll go without a companion for a while. See if I can stand it. I give myself a month. Two tops.

It’s 3:30pm. I’m tired. I haven’t gotten my ass chewed today for a job they ASKED me to do. It doesn’t seem like he’s going behind me and undoing what I have already done like he did last week. Asshat.

There is a customer here that calls me Snot so I call him Brat. He’s bringing me a truckload of pumpkins. Oh man. OK!!!

Today I leave you with this…….

Jeans

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Today has not been a good day….

………..and it will take more time than I have left to type it all out today. It will have to wait till later.

Highlights:

Nicole’s surgery did NOT go well. This upsets me and I am scared for her.

Owen’s surgery went VERY well. He’ll be home in a couple days! yay

Gary’s surgery went VERY well. He was home by 6pm and is doing just fine.

It was not even 8am this morning and I’m getting my ass chewed. If you are going to go behind me, remove the dates I put in and double check every fucking thing I do….DO IT YOURSELF.

I have a spot in my house that smells and I cannot pin point it. It’s driving me nuts.

I have to drink tonight. And heavily. I’m fucking done with SO many things.temper.jpg

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Well the hits just keep playing!!

-friend Nicole is in surgery right now.  Not gonna lie. I’m terrified for her. I just found her a couple years ago, we have just recently become good friends. And now this……..

-Gary has a procedure tomorrow then surgery on Thursday for his hernia. Ended up in ER this morning. Severe abdominal pain. Me? Padded room. MAJOR flashbacks of shit. Not good.

-Owen’s surgery is Thursday. Heart surgery.

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Then to top this ALL off……

-my dear friend Deb lost her father today.  She’s my easy to talk to pastor friend. I hurt for her.

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……on second thought…..

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Can I have a do over for the weekend? I had a good time….

Gary and I went to Jellystone and glamped with Brian. They have a very nice park model. Imagine 6’2″ Gary upstairs. I couldn’t even sit up in bed and it was just a mattress on the floor. But we made it work and it was fun. Brian is a great host. We mini golfed. Guess who kicked the men’s asses won? lol. 52-57-57. Yup. [ huffs on nails ]

After lunch, we headed home. Past the place where I like to camp. I really need to take Jegs and just go camp. I would LOVE to try out my new tent!

We went to Gary’s house and did a BUNCH in his lawn and OMG rearranged his kitchen!! We took the HUGE sideboard out, put that in the second living room and set up the WINE FRIDGE!!! I Love it. And what was especially cool about the wine fridge? Besides having cold wine when I NEED a glass at the drop of a hat, putting the handle on the door.

Wine fridge group (1)

Now, that may not sound like much. Till you remember WAY back when I got my new fridge. The freezer door handle was real wobbly. Well, it’s not anymore!!! The wine fridge and my freezer drawer handles go on the same way!! I FIXED MY FREEZER DRAWER HANDLE!! I’m so proud of myself.

Now tonight, I have to stop at Menard’s and get some white paint to finish the slats, long skinny screws to fix my drawer front, and get the pail of laundry room paint shaken up so I can touch up in that room.

I forgot my nasal spray today so am struggling to breathe …. ugh.

On a somber note. I have 2 friends having MAJOR surgery….one on Tuesday. One on Thursday. Needless to say I’M freaking out a bit……

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Tuesday – My friend Nicole has Vascular Thoracic Outlet Syndrome: She will be having her first rib removed, her subclavian vein and artery repaired. Her arm gets cold and it has no pulse.  Consequences of NOT doing the surgery are: loss of limb, stroke, pulmonary embolism or death. VERY risky surgery so I would appreciate any and all prayers, happy thoughts, good vibes ….whatever trips your trigger. Nicole is a new friend. Have known her about a year or so. SO fun. I enjoy spending time with her.

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My friend Owen needs bypass. Times 5. Apparently there are 6 arteries that come into your heart to make it pump. 5 of his 6 are blocked. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK!!

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His surgery is Thursday. So more happy thoughts, prayers, whatever for Owen. Thank God he is in shape, no health problems (diabetic…etc), non smoker. His risk factor is .02%. Wow. Nice for him. Owen is the husband of a friend. I’ve known her for like 35 years. I’ve known him for over 25? years now. He is good to my friend. That makes him tops in my book.

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And Friday? I am gonna DRINK.

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Heavily.

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